Don’t drop them all at the same time…
We are taught to block some relationships in order to heal our wounds, some approaches recommend especially being away from family or intimate partner/partners. I totally agree with this since it is inside our system of origin where we learned how to survive.
It is important to get space from them as a process of individuation and self reliance but one thing is a healthy distance and the other one is completely abandoning them from a fearful ego trying to isolate us from the world. This fear won’t help you heal. There will always be a space to fill in. From imperfection, from real loving acceptance and forgiveness.
We learn to interact, eat, love, problem solve, swim, laugh, cry, and live in our family of origin. This means that when we take that healthy space from them, we will re learn how to do all these things. Only if we are willing to pay the price and dare to resist and show up. If we do, we will find our way into a life created by us.
According to Psychology, individuation is supposed to happen during our teen years but who says it has to be that way? We go through the process we need to go whenever our soul needs it to happen. According to me, individuation happens over and over again. Many many times in life. It needs to re appear when we follow a Church or Religion, when we follow a Yoga Teacher, a self help group, a husband or wife. A daughter or son. Our inner circle of trust.
A healthy individuation process will take your life to the next level. It will help find and design you as you. Distance is important but most important is a deep understanding of who we are in order to negotiate the negotiable and stick to the non negotiable aspects of ourselves.
Meditate on your Sat Nam and make your loved ones be close to you while you get close to them. Healing is a two way journey. Let them heal through you and with you.
A great mantra for this purposes is Ra Ma Da Sa Sa Se So Hung. Find it in my website.